There are many many people that would love to quit their job to spend more time at home with their children. There are also many people who have been forced to stay home with their children because of the present economy. When faced with stay at home parenthood the first thing you have to ask yourself is, can I do it?
Now, this is sort of an intangible question, it encompasses a variety of subjects. From financial to social to metaphysical. The first question most people probably think of is can I make stay at home parenthood work financially? However, I think the latter two questions are far more important.
Socially, do you have a good support system to tap into once you cut your ties to your former work life? You may think that you'll continue to see your buddies from work, but once you're out of the trenches with them the relationships often slowly burn out. It's much like trying to maintain a high school relationship while going to separate colleges. It can work, but often doesn't. This is a lifestyle that often requires a very rugged social character. You're often on your own for long stretches of time without adult interaction, many times all you can do is grin and bear it. From the social standpoint, the most important thing you can do is be very outgoing. Especially if you're a stay at home dad, the stay at home parent landscape is seemingly dominated by moms. You're the stranger in a strange land here and as such the onus is on you to make relationships. In my experience, breaking in with the moms can be difficult, but very doable. Finding a Dads group is the best way to go, but due to the low numbers of stay at home dads it can be difficult to organize.
Metaphysical, you really need to know what your personal motivations and rewards are before quitting your job. You may think that you hate your job and would love to stop working, but you need to know how much of your character and motivation is wrapped up in your career status. I was an airline pilot before I was a stay at home dad. I hated my job but I did get a surge of satisfaction by telling people that I was a Captain for United Express. So much so that I find I often still preface the "What do you do" question with "I was an airline pilot and now I'm a stay at home dad." I know it's a little ridiculous but I like the degree of credibility that the airline pilot status gives. After a year and a half though, I'm slowly weaning myself off of this silly little shortcut. I'm proud of my former profession, but I'm more proud of my current one. Before you leave your job you have to search your soul and figure out if you can leave your status behind. The American tradition is such that nearly all of our worth is wrapped up in what we do for a living, how much money we make, where we went to college etc. Unfortunately, raising the best children you can and living a simple honest life often don't fit into others value of you. You'll have to grow thick skin and live off of your own internal satisfaction, but this is what you should have been doing all along. :)
Don't let any of this deter you though. All it takes is determination and openness to embark on stay at home parenthood. Initially you may be deterred by everything you have to leave behind, but you have to focus on everything that you can gain. Pursuing a career, especially a high status one can be very satisfying, but it's been done before. If you're an ambitious talented person, others will see you quitting your job as a crazy neurotic decision. Which is what I love about it. Because really, this is an ambitious, entrepreneurial, trail blazing endeavor. In a world of obese children, declining test scores and the break down of family systems you're drawing a line in the sand. You're telling the world that what matters isn't what you have, it's what you do for others. You're forming a relationship that could never exist in the world of daycare and nanny's. And most importantly you won't have to look back in 20 or 30 years and wish you had tried harder as a parent.
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