Interesting Stay at Home Article

http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/CollegeAndFamily/RaiseKids/CostOfBeingAStayAtHomeMom.aspx

I of course dislike that it automatically assumes a stay at home parent is female.    Otherwise, it offers some pretty sound advice.

Cut the Chord - How to live without cable

Upon moving to Denver we decided to do all we could to save money.   In that quest we did several things.   We decided to rent instead of buy, a savings of $750 a month.    We're cutting back on driving, walking and biking as much as possible.   We moved to a cheaper area of the country.    The decision that caused the most debate and sleepless nights though, was to go without cable.

We were spending $105 a month on cable and internet.   That seemed like a huge expense for a bunch of channels we never watched.   We did need internet, mostly so the mom-ster could do work from home.    I started to think about all the options available for TV on the internet and wondered, could I just use my computer as a TV?    Here's what I came up with.    About 50% of the shows that I watch are available on hulu, the rest are available on Netflix at the end of their season or for purchase from Itunes.    Netflix also has an enormous library of programing available on demand.   $42.95 for cable internet + $8.95 for Netflix = 51.90, a savings of $53.10 a month which to me is pretty significant.

Now, some people may be turned off to this option because they think they have to watch TV on their computer screen.   However, it's pretty easy to hoookup your computer to your tv, especially if you have a laptop.    The easiest option is to hook up an HDMI cable or VGA (monitor) cable to the back of your flat screen.   I don't have a flat screen so I hook an S Video cable from my computer to my 13 year old tv.   It doesn't work for internet viewing or word processing because the text is hard to read on an non-hdtv.   However, video's look great.

So what are your options for programming with a computer based TV?

1. Hulu, network TV sites like CBS, ABC, Comedy Central all offer streaming video of pretty decent quality.
2. Sites like YouTube or Funny or Die have original content not even available on normal TV networks, the quality (both picture and content) varies widely.
3. Pirate feeds of commercial programming.   Do a search for any of your favorite TV shows and you'll find hundreds of sites that offer streaming feeds of these shows.   They are obviously very illegal and prone to viruses, but they're an option if you're adventurous.   You can also download illegal copies of shows and movies from peer to peer programs and newsgroups.   I don't recommend or condone either action.   Because of liability and the propensity of these sites to harbor viruses.
4. As stated above pay services like Netflix and Hulu Plus offer large libraries of on demand programing for a much lower fee than cable.

The downside is if you're a sports fan this may not be the solution for you.   Though there are several options available to watch sports.   For instance, MLB offers a subscription service that allows you to watch either an individual team, or any game over a computer feed.    If you're primarily interested in one sport for the year this could be a more viable option than cable, which requires a basic subscription along with another subscription for things like NFL ticket.

So far I'm very happy to go without cable.   I'm obviously watching less tv, but I'm still able to watch all that I want.   I also find that watching TV is more of a planned event now, rather than the constant flipping through channels and concluding there was nothing to watch that I used to engage in.

Fixed gear for a fixed budget.

I have an insatiable desire to buy a new road bike.   Unfortunately, that's not really in the budget right now.    So what's my solution?   FIXED GEAR!    A fixed gear bicycle is about as basic as it gets, as long as the wheels are turning your feet are moving.    The beauty of this design is that you can use an old bike and get very good results.   I just bought a 70s or 60s Raleigh Grand Prix frame for $20 at a local bike shop.   I plan on slowly building it up this winter with used parts that I can find on the cheap.   It will be a fun project and I can learn a little more about bicycle mechanics.    Details will follow.  

If you're looking for an inexpensive project, building a fixed gear bicycle might be for you. 

How to quit your job to live the dream.

There are many many people that would love to quit their job to spend more time at home with their children.   There are also many people who have been forced to stay home with their children because of the present economy.    When faced with stay at home parenthood the first thing you have to ask yourself is, can I do it? 

Now, this is sort of an intangible question, it encompasses a variety of subjects.    From financial to social to metaphysical.   The first question most people probably think of is can I make stay at home parenthood work financially?    However, I think the latter two questions are far more important. 

Socially, do you have a good support system to tap into once you cut your ties to your former work life?   You may think that you'll continue to see your buddies from work, but once you're out of the trenches with them the relationships often slowly burn out.    It's much like trying to maintain a high school relationship while going to separate colleges.   It can work, but often doesn't.    This is a lifestyle that often requires a very rugged social character.   You're often on your own for long stretches of time without adult interaction, many times all you can do is grin and bear it.    From the social standpoint, the most important thing you can do is be very outgoing.    Especially if you're a stay at home dad, the stay at home parent landscape is seemingly dominated by moms.   You're the stranger in a strange land here and as such the onus is on you to make relationships.   In my experience, breaking in with the moms can be difficult, but very doable.    Finding a Dads group is the best way to go, but due to the low numbers of stay at home dads it can be difficult to organize.

Metaphysical, you really need to know what your personal motivations and rewards are before quitting your job.    You may think that you hate your job and would love to stop working, but you need to know how much of your character and motivation is wrapped up in your career status.    I was an airline pilot before I was a stay at home dad.   I hated my job but I did get a surge of satisfaction by telling people that I was a Captain for United Express.   So much so that I find I often still preface the "What do you do" question with "I was an airline pilot and now I'm a stay at home dad."    I know it's a little ridiculous but I like the degree of credibility that the airline pilot status gives.    After a year and a half though, I'm slowly weaning myself off of this silly little shortcut.   I'm proud of my former profession, but I'm more proud of my current one.     Before you leave your job you have to search your soul and figure out if you can leave your status behind.    The American tradition is such that nearly all of our worth is wrapped up in what we do for a living, how much money we make, where we went to college etc.    Unfortunately, raising the best children you can and living a simple honest life often don't fit into others value of you.    You'll have to grow thick skin and live off of your own internal satisfaction, but this is what you should have been doing all along. :)

Don't let any of this deter you though.   All it takes is determination and openness to embark on stay at home parenthood.   Initially you may be deterred by everything you have to leave behind, but you have to focus on everything that you can gain.    Pursuing a career, especially a high status one can be very satisfying, but it's been done before.    If you're an ambitious talented person, others will see you quitting your job as a crazy neurotic decision.   Which is what I love about it.   Because really, this is an ambitious, entrepreneurial, trail blazing endeavor.   In a world of obese children, declining test scores and the break down of family systems you're drawing a line in the sand.    You're telling the world that what matters isn't what you have, it's what you do for others.    You're forming a relationship that could never exist in the world of daycare and nanny's.  And most importantly you won't have to look back in 20 or 30 years and wish you had tried harder as a parent.

Denver Doings

In our search for subsistence Max and I have discovered the Denver Childrens Museum.   To be fair Jen told us to get in the car and drove us there.    In the American male masculine tradition though I'd like to stake my claim at this discovery, but I digress.   

The museum is a sprawling affair with plenty to do for kids up to about age 12 or so.    Max particularly enjoyed the train room which featured buckets of Thomas the Tank Engine trains and tracks.    There was also a decommissioned fire truck complete with working lights and sirens that he could play in among other things.    There was also a large outside play area with a playground and a sandbox inside a large inflatable dome which was very unique.

At the end of the session we decided to purchase a $90 year membership.   I normally say "if it's free it's me, if I have to pay no way."   But Jen's logic was pretty solid on this one.    We need somewhere to go on a regular basis.    And we really need an indoor activity once the weather starts to cool.   If you're looking for a kid friendly activity in Denver, I'd recommend the museum.

Looking for a new play group.

M-dog and I are finally getting settled in DEN.   However, I can tell by both of our manic activity that we need a new playgroup.   My wife found an interesting lead in the Highlands Mommies group.   Sure the name is a little pejorative but apparently they have a corner of the site that features dads.   I'll keep you updated.

Here's the link to the site

Highlands Mommies

Not yet dead in Denver

We rolled into Denver one week ago and it's finally starting to feel (and look) like home.   We're finally starting to see the end of unpacking the boxes and it's finally time to start tackling more daunting pursuits.   Bootstrapping a playgroup for Max and I.    The good news is that it seems like Denver is a much more friendly city than nearly anywhere on the east coast, we're also in a pretty liberal bohemian area.   So I'm hoping that a mildly eccentric Stay at Home Dad like myself isn't as much of a peculiarity.   Stay tuned as I report my attempts to penetrate the parental fortress of stay at home mom-hood.

I'd love to see some comments or suggestions about my current pursuit.